Zombie Lady poses with the flock at her Pink Flamingo Gene Mutation Facility. Someday they will be as big as dragons, and she and her Undead Army will soar through the skies on their backs. Eagles or hawks may have been fiercer choices, but nowhere near as fabulous.
Zombie Lady loves to go to the movie theater. She’s thrilled when someone pulls out their cell phone during the movie, because eating them is a total freebie.
Zombie Lady wonders: since people who eat vegetables are called vegetarians, does that make her a humanitarian?
After a long day at work, Zombie Lady cracks open several bottle of vodka. The advantage of being undead for thousands of years? You develop quite a tolerance.
Zombie Lady loves to go to St. Patrick’s in Chicago because Irish people go so well with potatoes.
Zombie Lady swoons over Ivan Albright’s The Picture of Dorian Gray, wishing she could find a guy that hot.
When Zombie Lady stands at the bottom of a lake, she looks up at all of the splashing arms and legs above her, and starts a game of Eenie Meenie Miney Moe. She does not abide by the rules of the third verse.
